My blog is like a box of chocolates; you never know what you're gonna get. Sometimes deep, philosophical and theological questions and debates, sometimes half-baked theories on the world around me, sometimes just general updates on what's going on in my life. Take a look around, feel free to comment, enjoy!
Thursday, November 19, 2009
My family
My family is messed up. Long story short (if you're really close to me, you probably know most of the story), my aunts and my mom had a big falling out 2 years ago and have been fighting ever since, putting both of my grandparent's in the middle of it. My Paw-Paw died 2 weeks ago, and now I found out my cousin committed suicide last weekend. This should be enough to bring a family back together to be there for one another, but it isn't. Please pray for my aunts and my mom and uncle so they can know how to fix the situation and be humble and courageous enough to do it. And pray for my cousins (I'm thinking my generation will be a little more calm-headed and able to work things out) so we can try to help in any way we can. And pray especially for my Nenny who's taking all of this kinda rough and for my aunt, since this means she's lost her husband, father, and one of her sons in the same year. I know we've had our differences, but I really hurt for her, especially in light of the losses I've suffered lately. Thanks for your prayer, just thought I'd explain my status a little bit.
Psalm 73
I highly recommend y'all check this one out. It was what I needed to hear today. The whole first half of the psalm talks about how we view the wicked/arrogant(verses 3-5, 12): "For I envied the arrogant when I saw the prosperity of the wicked. They have no struggles; their bodies are healthy and strong. They are free from the burdens common to man; they are not plagued by human ills........This is what the wicked are like--always carefree, they increase in wealth."
How true this is sometimes! We see the wicked of this world or people who aren't doing right and they seem to have no problems at all and seem to get what they want (and at times, what WE want). We start to think, "why am I doing what's right?" (verse 13: "Surely in vain have I kept my heart pure; in vain have I washed my hands in innocence.") We think, "If I would just do it like them, I would get the desires of my heart. They don't have troubles like I do. Their conscience is not as troubled as mine." It can really be discouraging! (verse 16: "When I tried to understand all this, it was oppressive to me...")
We have to come to God with our hurts and concerns. Our minds can do severe damage to our hearts if we let it. We have to let God speak truth into our souls. We can be so easily deceived.
Take courage in the path God has given you and really seek him to guide your steps. It will be hard. You will lose friends, family, loved ones. But the ones who are still with you on the other side, those are worth holding on to
How true this is sometimes! We see the wicked of this world or people who aren't doing right and they seem to have no problems at all and seem to get what they want (and at times, what WE want). We start to think, "why am I doing what's right?" (verse 13: "Surely in vain have I kept my heart pure; in vain have I washed my hands in innocence.") We think, "If I would just do it like them, I would get the desires of my heart. They don't have troubles like I do. Their conscience is not as troubled as mine." It can really be discouraging! (verse 16: "When I tried to understand all this, it was oppressive to me...")
We have to come to God with our hurts and concerns. Our minds can do severe damage to our hearts if we let it. We have to let God speak truth into our souls. We can be so easily deceived.
Take courage in the path God has given you and really seek him to guide your steps. It will be hard. You will lose friends, family, loved ones. But the ones who are still with you on the other side, those are worth holding on to
James 1
Sometimes you read something really awesome and you just feel like you need to write about it.
Having just finished Psalms (it took me over 5 months!), I decided I need to read a shorter book, and I usually alternate OT-NT so I decided I'd read James and maybe go into I & II Peter and possible the Johns since they're little. I forgot how the little books seem to pack a punch and condense a lot of teaching into a little space! Anyways James 1 is awesome, read it sometime. Here's some things that jumped out at me.
Verse 2: "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds..." At first I was like, "why wouldn't you consider it joy when you face all kinds of trials. Then, I got to thinking and realized that some trials don't come from God to test and strengthen our faith. Some trials come to us from our own doing, because we have sinned. Obviously, you wouldn't consider the fact that you had to go through those trials joy. But the verses go on to say that trials test your faith, developing perseverance to make us mature. I do believe that even trials that come as a result of our sin can be used to develop perseverance and maturity.
OK, that thought was a little elementary, but trust me, I get a lot deeper from here on out. ;)
A few verses down from that, in verses 6-8, it talks about asking God and not doubting God will answer him. It's talking about when you're asking for wisdom, but I think this applies to asking God for anything. You have to believe and not doubt. It says "he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind" and it calls that man a "double-minded man, unstable in all he does." So many times, we ask God for direction, or to provide something for us, whether it be a material need or a spiritual trait, but don't trust God completely to come through. In the back of our mind, we come up with a contingency plan in case God doesn't hold up his end of the bargain. This especially speaks to me right now, because I'm in the middle of a serious soul search with God, for answers to some questions. But I'm constantly arguing with myself and struggling to understand exactly how God will answer these questions. So, the flesh in me says to have a plan B, in case I don't get my answers by X time. I must trust God completely, and so, put all my eggs in one basket, so to speak. That's what real faith and trust is.
In a similar note, it mentions a few times in James 1 about "being deceived," and "deceiving yourselves." Again, this scares me in light of what I'm seeking God for right now. I desperately want to make sure that my answers come from God, not myself or another source. But how can you really tell that it's from God? So many people I know have done things that, to me, scream "No!!" but said "God was leading them" to do it. Now, I can't say for sure God wasn't, I can only go on what I know of God and what I think He would think of such things, but a few of the things I have seen end badly and I'm pretty sure God wasn't really leading them to it. So how do you know when you're hearing from God or when you're deceiving yourself? Deceiving yourself is a scary, scary thought. How do you avoid deceiving yourself? That should be the one person you can trust! I guess the key lies in seeking counsel and really trusting that God's going to give you your answers through them.
I was talking with a dear friend the other day and we were exasperated that "God doesn't work in neon." He's not going to lay it all out for you (well, at least, He's not likely to). He's going to require a little faith and trust. But we have to trust that He will guide us if we seek Him wholly and completely.
So that's what I'm trying to do. Your prayers are welcomed.
Having just finished Psalms (it took me over 5 months!), I decided I need to read a shorter book, and I usually alternate OT-NT so I decided I'd read James and maybe go into I & II Peter and possible the Johns since they're little. I forgot how the little books seem to pack a punch and condense a lot of teaching into a little space! Anyways James 1 is awesome, read it sometime. Here's some things that jumped out at me.
Verse 2: "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds..." At first I was like, "why wouldn't you consider it joy when you face all kinds of trials. Then, I got to thinking and realized that some trials don't come from God to test and strengthen our faith. Some trials come to us from our own doing, because we have sinned. Obviously, you wouldn't consider the fact that you had to go through those trials joy. But the verses go on to say that trials test your faith, developing perseverance to make us mature. I do believe that even trials that come as a result of our sin can be used to develop perseverance and maturity.
OK, that thought was a little elementary, but trust me, I get a lot deeper from here on out. ;)
A few verses down from that, in verses 6-8, it talks about asking God and not doubting God will answer him. It's talking about when you're asking for wisdom, but I think this applies to asking God for anything. You have to believe and not doubt. It says "he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind" and it calls that man a "double-minded man, unstable in all he does." So many times, we ask God for direction, or to provide something for us, whether it be a material need or a spiritual trait, but don't trust God completely to come through. In the back of our mind, we come up with a contingency plan in case God doesn't hold up his end of the bargain. This especially speaks to me right now, because I'm in the middle of a serious soul search with God, for answers to some questions. But I'm constantly arguing with myself and struggling to understand exactly how God will answer these questions. So, the flesh in me says to have a plan B, in case I don't get my answers by X time. I must trust God completely, and so, put all my eggs in one basket, so to speak. That's what real faith and trust is.
In a similar note, it mentions a few times in James 1 about "being deceived," and "deceiving yourselves." Again, this scares me in light of what I'm seeking God for right now. I desperately want to make sure that my answers come from God, not myself or another source. But how can you really tell that it's from God? So many people I know have done things that, to me, scream "No!!" but said "God was leading them" to do it. Now, I can't say for sure God wasn't, I can only go on what I know of God and what I think He would think of such things, but a few of the things I have seen end badly and I'm pretty sure God wasn't really leading them to it. So how do you know when you're hearing from God or when you're deceiving yourself? Deceiving yourself is a scary, scary thought. How do you avoid deceiving yourself? That should be the one person you can trust! I guess the key lies in seeking counsel and really trusting that God's going to give you your answers through them.
I was talking with a dear friend the other day and we were exasperated that "God doesn't work in neon." He's not going to lay it all out for you (well, at least, He's not likely to). He's going to require a little faith and trust. But we have to trust that He will guide us if we seek Him wholly and completely.
So that's what I'm trying to do. Your prayers are welcomed.
Luke (the gospel, not the person)
Here's my first thoughts from Luke 1:
This was a long chapter, so I read it over a few days and re-read it. But one thing that stuck out to me what the fact that Gabriel didn't treat Zechariah and Mary the same. Gabriel goes to Zechariah and says "you're going to be a daddy," and Zechariah's response is "How can I be sure of this? i'm an old man and my wife is well along in years." And Gabriel punishes him for his doubt and Zechariah can't speak until John is born. Then, a few paragraphs later, Gabriel goes to Mary and tells her she's going to give birth to a son and He will be "the Son of the Most High." And Mary says, "How will this be, since I am a virgin?" And Gabriel doesn't punish her. I wonder why? She showed the same doubt, though her prophecy was a lot harder to swallow (I mean a couple of old folks getting pregnant vs. immaculate conception? haha), plus, I mean, she was going to be the mother of the Lord, Jesus. So maybe she got a little special treatment. :) I guess there's slightly different connotation in the two questions too (plus, we don't know how exactly they were asked, the meaning can be greatly changed by how it is spoken). Zechariah's seems more like, "prove it," and Mary's more like "explain how." I don't know, what do you guys think?
I was reading in Luke 2 today and the part near the middle (verse 40), puzzled me and got me thinking about something else too. It's talking about Jesus as a baby/child. It says "And the child grew and became strong; he was filled with wisdom, and the grace of God was upon him." Now, I'm not sure if this was Jesus as a baby or when He was ... Read Morebecoming a kid (I know it's before He was 12, cuz the next story starts with him being 12), but if it was when He was a little baby, I found it interesting to think of a little baby being filled with wisdom. That got me thinking, how much to babies really know/understand? I mean, they don't have the communication skills yet, so they can't really tell us what they are thinking, but maybe they really understand more than we think they do. Then, I wonder if Jesus BECAME filled with wisdom as He grew, or if He was just born with all the knowledge He had when He was with the Father. Can you imagine, being baby Jesus and knowing everything there was to know about the universe, but needing someone to change your diaper? That truly is humbling Himself, like it talks about in Philippians. Anyways, just something I was thinking about.
Luke 3:15-17~> "The people were waiting expectantly and were all wondering IN THEIR HEARTS if John might possibly be the the Christ. John answered them all..." (emphasis mine)
Later in the gospels, they use similar wording to show that Jesus read people's minds and answered questions that were hidden deep in their hearts (Luke 5:17-26). So, my ... Read Morequestion is, do you think John the Baptist performed miracles and could see into people's hearts? Part of me wants to boil it down to John knowing what they were thinking because of their faces or just knowing what people would probably think in this situation. But since they use such similar wording, I feel it deserves ponderment (not a word, just made it up, haha), cuz obviously they were trying to convey a similar situation. Anyways, what do you guys think? Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think it numerates any miracles from John in the gospels, though I could be mistaken.
This was a long chapter, so I read it over a few days and re-read it. But one thing that stuck out to me what the fact that Gabriel didn't treat Zechariah and Mary the same. Gabriel goes to Zechariah and says "you're going to be a daddy," and Zechariah's response is "How can I be sure of this? i'm an old man and my wife is well along in years." And Gabriel punishes him for his doubt and Zechariah can't speak until John is born. Then, a few paragraphs later, Gabriel goes to Mary and tells her she's going to give birth to a son and He will be "the Son of the Most High." And Mary says, "How will this be, since I am a virgin?" And Gabriel doesn't punish her. I wonder why? She showed the same doubt, though her prophecy was a lot harder to swallow (I mean a couple of old folks getting pregnant vs. immaculate conception? haha), plus, I mean, she was going to be the mother of the Lord, Jesus. So maybe she got a little special treatment. :) I guess there's slightly different connotation in the two questions too (plus, we don't know how exactly they were asked, the meaning can be greatly changed by how it is spoken). Zechariah's seems more like, "prove it," and Mary's more like "explain how." I don't know, what do you guys think?
I was reading in Luke 2 today and the part near the middle (verse 40), puzzled me and got me thinking about something else too. It's talking about Jesus as a baby/child. It says "And the child grew and became strong; he was filled with wisdom, and the grace of God was upon him." Now, I'm not sure if this was Jesus as a baby or when He was ... Read Morebecoming a kid (I know it's before He was 12, cuz the next story starts with him being 12), but if it was when He was a little baby, I found it interesting to think of a little baby being filled with wisdom. That got me thinking, how much to babies really know/understand? I mean, they don't have the communication skills yet, so they can't really tell us what they are thinking, but maybe they really understand more than we think they do. Then, I wonder if Jesus BECAME filled with wisdom as He grew, or if He was just born with all the knowledge He had when He was with the Father. Can you imagine, being baby Jesus and knowing everything there was to know about the universe, but needing someone to change your diaper? That truly is humbling Himself, like it talks about in Philippians. Anyways, just something I was thinking about.
Luke 3:15-17~> "The people were waiting expectantly and were all wondering IN THEIR HEARTS if John might possibly be the the Christ. John answered them all..." (emphasis mine)
Later in the gospels, they use similar wording to show that Jesus read people's minds and answered questions that were hidden deep in their hearts (Luke 5:17-26). So, my ... Read Morequestion is, do you think John the Baptist performed miracles and could see into people's hearts? Part of me wants to boil it down to John knowing what they were thinking because of their faces or just knowing what people would probably think in this situation. But since they use such similar wording, I feel it deserves ponderment (not a word, just made it up, haha), cuz obviously they were trying to convey a similar situation. Anyways, what do you guys think? Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think it numerates any miracles from John in the gospels, though I could be mistaken.
More Good Stuff
This is kind of a continuation of the previous note, but it's a different cool thing and it's more specific, so it needed it's own note.
I was trying to look up a verse I was going to share with a friend of mine who had a big conversation coming up. I was trying to find the verse about bringing a brother back when they've been sinning, and winning them over. The closest one I found (though I don't think it was the one I had in mind) was in Matthew 18:15.
So, like I said, this wasn't exactly the verse I was looking for, so I did a bible search for "bring" on bible.com. As I was quickly perusing the results, one caught my eye from Psalm 68. Verse 11 says (in the NLT) "The Lord gives the word, and a great army brings the good news." The footnote says that for "army," you could translate "a host of women." This obviously puzzled and encouraged me, for why would one be able to translate "army" to "host of women." Apparently, in the Hebrew manuscripts the word is company which translates to "army," like a company in the army. In the Greek, the word "company," translates to a "host of women" as in the Nativity story when it talks about the archangel announcing to the shepherds where they can find Jesus and then a great company of angels appearing and singing glory and praises to Jesus. Basically, a company is a group of people who sing about awesome things that have been done, or just proclaim the word.
Here's why this is awesome (if you didn't pick up on it yet). God is giving His daughters, this army of women, the task of bringing the good news, spreading the gospel. He doesn't tell us to just hang out and support what the men are doing. We are an army!! We are to support what the men are doing, don't get me wrong, but we are given a purpose as well. It's an un-transferable mission that we were created to fulfill. That is awesome! So I challenge you ladies, to BE that army and proclaim the gospel with boldness! This is not a NT idea, this is straight up out the OT!! BE an army for God! Proclaim His good works and His glory!!
I was trying to look up a verse I was going to share with a friend of mine who had a big conversation coming up. I was trying to find the verse about bringing a brother back when they've been sinning, and winning them over. The closest one I found (though I don't think it was the one I had in mind) was in Matthew 18:15.
So, like I said, this wasn't exactly the verse I was looking for, so I did a bible search for "bring" on bible.com. As I was quickly perusing the results, one caught my eye from Psalm 68. Verse 11 says (in the NLT) "The Lord gives the word, and a great army brings the good news." The footnote says that for "army," you could translate "a host of women." This obviously puzzled and encouraged me, for why would one be able to translate "army" to "host of women." Apparently, in the Hebrew manuscripts the word is company which translates to "army," like a company in the army. In the Greek, the word "company," translates to a "host of women" as in the Nativity story when it talks about the archangel announcing to the shepherds where they can find Jesus and then a great company of angels appearing and singing glory and praises to Jesus. Basically, a company is a group of people who sing about awesome things that have been done, or just proclaim the word.
Here's why this is awesome (if you didn't pick up on it yet). God is giving His daughters, this army of women, the task of bringing the good news, spreading the gospel. He doesn't tell us to just hang out and support what the men are doing. We are an army!! We are to support what the men are doing, don't get me wrong, but we are given a purpose as well. It's an un-transferable mission that we were created to fulfill. That is awesome! So I challenge you ladies, to BE that army and proclaim the gospel with boldness! This is not a NT idea, this is straight up out the OT!! BE an army for God! Proclaim His good works and His glory!!
1 Thessalonians
I stumbled across a couple of really cool things last week in God's Word and felt I should share it with people. Like I do.
I was reading in 1 Thessalonians and came across a familiar verse about how we would not be "in passionate lust like the heathen." The full verse says "It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God." Here's where I break it down:
I noticed for the first time the footnote associated with the phrase "control his own body." In other manuscripts it translates "live with his own wife." In still other manuscripts it translates "acquire a wife." Using that last translation, the verse says that it is God's will we should "learn to acquire a wife in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust." This perplexed and encouraged me. It correlated nicely with what my small group was talking about on Wednesday about how we are to live apart from this world, we are to stand up and stand out from this world system. So what does it mean to seek a spouse in a holy and honorable way, not in passionate lust? The world tells us that when a person catches our eye, we start going out with them to see if we are compatible, giving our hearts away first, then seeing if they are worthy. Then, eventually, we ask God if we're supposed to marry them, or we see they are not right for us and we break it off, trying to reclaim as much of our heart as we can get back, and moving on to see who else is around that might be right for us. This constant trial and error leaves us tired, jaded, a wilted flower. It's not fun, it's not romantic, it's certainly not holy nor honorable. So why do we keep doing it? What drives us? I hurt for these hurt people. I'd give anything to save them the strife and pain.
That's what I've got. A social commentary that burdens me day in, day out. I don't have a magical solution, because the only real solution is for you to want to be different than the robots of this world. Know that there is a different way, but I can't force it down your throats (believe me, I've tried).
Just something that's really on my heart, feel free to comment or ask questions.
With all the love Christ lavishes on me,
~Jennifer~
I was reading in 1 Thessalonians and came across a familiar verse about how we would not be "in passionate lust like the heathen." The full verse says "It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God." Here's where I break it down:
I noticed for the first time the footnote associated with the phrase "control his own body." In other manuscripts it translates "live with his own wife." In still other manuscripts it translates "acquire a wife." Using that last translation, the verse says that it is God's will we should "learn to acquire a wife in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust." This perplexed and encouraged me. It correlated nicely with what my small group was talking about on Wednesday about how we are to live apart from this world, we are to stand up and stand out from this world system. So what does it mean to seek a spouse in a holy and honorable way, not in passionate lust? The world tells us that when a person catches our eye, we start going out with them to see if we are compatible, giving our hearts away first, then seeing if they are worthy. Then, eventually, we ask God if we're supposed to marry them, or we see they are not right for us and we break it off, trying to reclaim as much of our heart as we can get back, and moving on to see who else is around that might be right for us. This constant trial and error leaves us tired, jaded, a wilted flower. It's not fun, it's not romantic, it's certainly not holy nor honorable. So why do we keep doing it? What drives us? I hurt for these hurt people. I'd give anything to save them the strife and pain.
That's what I've got. A social commentary that burdens me day in, day out. I don't have a magical solution, because the only real solution is for you to want to be different than the robots of this world. Know that there is a different way, but I can't force it down your throats (believe me, I've tried).
Just something that's really on my heart, feel free to comment or ask questions.
With all the love Christ lavishes on me,
~Jennifer~
Interesting thoughts from Haggai
I was reading in Haggai the other day (yes, Haggai) and came across this interesting illustration that Haggai gave to the people from God:
" 'If a person carries consecrated meat in the fold of his garment, and that fold touches some bread or stew, some wine, oil or other good, does it become consecrated?'
The priests answered, 'No.'
Then Haggai said, 'If a person defiled by contact with a dead body touches one of these things, does it become defiled?'
'Yes,' the priests replied, 'it becomes defiled.' "
Here's what I found interesting about this. We can be good and do good and just radiate goodness, but it's not necessarily going to cause goodness in others. Sadly, the good just doesn't rub off quite like the bad does. It's very easy, however, for our sin to defile many and our bad attitudes and comments to effect a negative change in others. I wish it weren't so; I wish the good in us could just as easily stimulate good in others, but it just doesn't work that way. This, of course, does not mean we should not try to be filled with the Spirit and do God's Will, for it does, in some part, "rub off" on others. But that sin nature still dying inside us causes the good produced in us by the Holy Spirit (and only by the Holy Spirit) to be more readily faded than the bad that is naturally produced in us.
I don't know, it made sense in my head.
" 'If a person carries consecrated meat in the fold of his garment, and that fold touches some bread or stew, some wine, oil or other good, does it become consecrated?'
The priests answered, 'No.'
Then Haggai said, 'If a person defiled by contact with a dead body touches one of these things, does it become defiled?'
'Yes,' the priests replied, 'it becomes defiled.' "
Here's what I found interesting about this. We can be good and do good and just radiate goodness, but it's not necessarily going to cause goodness in others. Sadly, the good just doesn't rub off quite like the bad does. It's very easy, however, for our sin to defile many and our bad attitudes and comments to effect a negative change in others. I wish it weren't so; I wish the good in us could just as easily stimulate good in others, but it just doesn't work that way. This, of course, does not mean we should not try to be filled with the Spirit and do God's Will, for it does, in some part, "rub off" on others. But that sin nature still dying inside us causes the good produced in us by the Holy Spirit (and only by the Holy Spirit) to be more readily faded than the bad that is naturally produced in us.
I don't know, it made sense in my head.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)